Regrets Come Easy But the Payback Isn’t Cheap Or Is It?

It seems like I’m going backwards. Instead of charging ahead and taking the world by abandon I seem to be shrinking into my own abyss. I blame this on two things: my lack of motivation and my lousy choice in men. Why these two you ask. Well, first off I have all the skills needed to get out there and change my destiny but I lack the actual motivation to make it stick. I know what I hate about the way I act in relationships and how I pick and choose my relationships and matters like these but I don’t actually change them. This is a key problem. The second part is not so easy. Dating the wrong men is learned behavior and takes longer to undo, that I’m working on. I think we all fall into our own little traps and dwell on what we regret more than we should. If we cut out regret would we ever learn? I don’t think so.

Hanging Out and Hanging On

It’s as if everyone’s looking for someone. Or is it something, or someone. Sometimes the difference isn’t exactly clear. My other keen observation is that we’re all in a rush to get to that someone or something. It’s as if we’re avoiding feeling, excuse me for lack of a better word, something. What is that something? That something that we don’t want to feel? Well, tonight it’s loneliness. Loneliness is one of the most underestimated, strongest emotions. It can move us, screw us and use us.  The lengths we will go to avoid it are astonishing and the things we put ourselves through sometimes downright atrocious. Its a wicked feeling. Does it control us more than we like? Are we victims to an emotion? Or are we playing out our own story?

Disposable Relationships and the “In Between” Fling

Holding out or holding on? Giving in or giving up? Settling down or just plain settling? It’s easy to pick someone, its often easy enough to find the person we want to be with. Actually being with them is a bit harder. Do we hold on to that feeling? That good vibe we get from knowing we may have made a decent match this time around. Do we pine away? Or do we essentially love the one we’re with? Half way love affairs and “in between” flings can be good and bad. Sometimes you might just find what you’re looking for in between the lines of defining a relationship and getting what your heart desires.